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Shadows of Forgotten Ancestors

Growing up, I had two cousins of nearly my age. Sasha was born ten days earlier than me and Ivan - two and half weeks later. As kids, we grew up playing together, went to the same primary and middle school, and the same class. Now both of them are dead. Ivan died about 10 years ago, someone (or a group) killed him or he hanged himself - it's inconclusive. Sasha got killed at war with russia, just two weeks ago.  Sasha, may his soul rests in peace.  My father died when I was 11. His elder brother (my uncle), passed away few years later. And three out of four grandparents are already  there . While death of elders brain perceives as something can be explained and understood  (which was still a devastating loss), I am struggling to comprehend the fact that two of my cousins, who were of my age, are gone. As I got to know about death of Sasha at war, I felt sadness and anger. I also thought that if I have stayed in the village, or not making it out of Ukraine in the end February , it c

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